The sun has finally returned today and to say I am glad to see it would be an understatement.
Our wedding guests all packed up and went back home yesterday, just in time for our new guests to come through the door. One nice woman is here for a conference and a couple from London are taking a couple of days to explore our great city.
And today, we prepare for the influx of Red Sox fans. We are sold out most of this week which makes both me and my wallet a bit happier as well. But there is so much more to happiness that all of this. I am also happy that it is my partner Jeff's birthday today, but i am digressing.
The more I think about being happy, the more I have come to realize that happiness is a constant state of mind rather than an accumulation of things and events. We can either choose to be happy with where we are and what we have or play a victim of circumstance and look for someone to pin our displeasure onto. True, factors might not be the best for many of us right now, but look at what we do have that so many others do not and that we can make changes to make our life, at least some part of it, that much better.
What have you done lately to make your outlook a little brighter?
When did you last help someone else because you wanted to rather than feeling obligated to do so?
When did you last do something nice for yourself even if it is as small as stopping in the middle of your crazed and chaotic day for a true coffee break, where you leave you workspace, sip a cafe au lait or chai tea and just breathed deeply and alowed yourself to experience true joy?
Try it right now. Take a deep breath as you slowly count to ten, hold it for three seconds, then slowly let the air out counting from ten on down. As you do so, think of a a truly happy moment in your life, maybe getting your first puppy, or your wedding day, whatever it may be...now picture every detail of it, how did the air smell, how did the light reflect on things, so on and so forth...anchor yourself there and just luxuriate in that heady light feeling of bliss.
It is hard to be this thoroughly happy everyday, but think now about one or two things you could do, however slight, that would make you a happier person and write it down on paper as a promise to yourself that you will do it. (Putting things on paper has been scientifically shown to increase your commitment to whatever is written.) It could be a weekend get-a-away or to buy yourself flowers once a week, maybe you would like a different hair style or an extra fifteen minutes to just lay in bed after the alarm goes off.
Now enjoy the rest of your day and smile and follow through with your personal promise. If you cannot keep promises you make to yourself, you cannot be happy when making promises to anyone else.
Strive for happiness.
To me, unselfish happiness is what life is all about.